


Time.

by littlewitchhazels



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst, F/M, I suppose?, Introspection, M/M, Sad Ending, Unspecified Gender Shepard, lets all cry together about kaidan being left behind, tbh not entirely sure how to tag this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2017-09-29
Packaged: 2018-12-31 06:44:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12126780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlewitchhazels/pseuds/littlewitchhazels
Summary: In which, at the end of all things, Kaidan reflects on all the things that could have been and all the things he should have said. If only there had been more time.





	Time.

“No matter what happens, know that I love you. Always.”

Kaidan could only watch helplessly as Shepard’s hand slipped from his, leaving him grasping the empty air for just one last comforting touch before everything they once had slipped from through his fingers all over again. There was nothing quite like the gut wrenching anguish that plagued his mind as his thoughts ran wild with words he never had the opportunity to say. If only they had more time… 

He would have told Shepard just how much their time together meant to him, from their SR-1 days ’til now, no matter how many hardships they went through together across the three years they’d known each other. It was all worth it, no matter what. Every single waking moment together was something to be cherished.

He would have told Shepard that, in all his years, nobody had ever made him feel so alive or so terribly human. That nothing could compare to the quiet moments between missions where nothing except them — together, at peace and content — mattered. Oh, how he craved one last gentle touch to hold dear until the end of time. 

He would have told Shepard of all the plans he had for the lives ahead of them — after the war, after all of this. He would have described, in great detail, the house by the sea so very far away from everything in the world that would ever hurt them, then Shepard would laugh and pitch in one or two suggestions to their collective dream that would make it all perfect. Just the concept of the two of them together was enough to make him happy.

Kaidan would have told Shepard just how much he cared, how much he loved the idea of them against the world and all of life’s challenges. Whatever the world threw at them, they'd be ready — Reapers and all. Hell, one day, when all of this was finally over, he would have even asked Shepard to marry him.

But now, watching as Shepard’s form was engulfed in the blinding light of the Beacon, it felt as if the world was crumbling down around him. All the light, all the life, sucked dry from the fabric of the universe as the one good thing in his life charged headstrong into the jaws of death itself. And all he could think of were the little ‘what-if’s that he never had the courage to say.

If only there had been more time.

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, I'll never be over the ending of ME3.
> 
> Side note: I was really apprehensive about posting this because, even after reading and rewriting sections about a million times, I'm still not entirely sure about my presentation of an unspecified-gender Shep... I mean, it's mainly focused on Kaidan's POV, but hmm... Any feedback would be greatly appreciated :)


End file.
